This week, we continue with 7 more of our top 10 ways to practice self-love. Mama Z will show you how to indulge in an aromatic bath or shower. We’ll talk about the importance of spa days and massages and how to manage them on your budget.
We’ll review some specific self-care tips for scarring, pregnancy, and postpartum, and men, and discuss why good nutrition is really an act of self-love.
We’ll show you how decluttering, cleaning and redecorating can make you feel better about your home, how giving of yourself can make you feel better about life, and how to stay encouraged.
Finally, we’ll talk about building relationships with friends you value and reducing harmful relationships. We’ll even give you tips for increasing intimacy with your spouse.
Sound interesting? Join as we discuss cultivating self-love to create a more abundant life!
Natural Living Family Podcast Episode Nine Highlights – Powerful Ways to Practice Self-Love:
- Topic introduction, what’s in our diffuser and part 1 recap (1:55)
- Kim Morrison and self-love techniques (4:40)
- Self-love tip #1: Aromatic bath or shower, spa days and affording massages (5:28)
- Mama Z’s post-shower routine and oil base (12:46)
- Pregnancy and stretch mark care (16:53)
- Self-pampering for men (21:01)
- Self-love tip #2: Proper nutrition as self-love (24:38)
- Self-love tip #3: Declutter, clean and/or redecorate a room (31:20)
- Self-love tip #4: Share yourself with others (39:14)
- Self-love tip #5: Carry a Bible verse with you (45:50)
- Self-love tip #6: Meet with friends that lift you up (48:45)
- Self-care tip #7: Cultivating intimacy in your life and date night tips (1:03:50)
- Natural living tip and episode wrap (1:10:21)
- Wrap up and upcoming topic
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Favorite Quotes from Episode Nine – More Ways to Practice Self-Love!
“If you’re in a situation where you find yourself spending time with colleagues or friends that don’t treat you appropriately, you need to separate yourself first.” – Dr. Z
“Whenever you can pray for somebody. That’s another gift we have to give to the world.” – Mama Z
“Love yourself enough to spend time with the people that help you be your best version of you.” – Dr. Z
“What you put into the lives of other people comes back into your own life.”– Mama Z
“The power of positive thinking is that it literally changes the physiology of your brain.” – Dr. Z
Click Here to Read the Transcript
The Art of Self-Love Part 2 – More Ways to Practice Self-Love Podcast Episode 9
The contents of this presentation are for informational purposes only and are not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This presentation does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
[0:00 – 0:33] Prelude
Mama Z: Where’s the coupon in the mailbox for this week? Where am I going?
Dr. Z: You tried to cut my hair once. That’s not self-love. That’s not happening again.
Mama Z: Listen, when I cut his hair, I thought it looked pretty good, okay. So, and then I asked him for my tip and he goes, “Believe me. Me not paying you any extra is the tip.”
Dr. Z: All right. I love you. You’re my favorite.
Mama Z: Okay, so I have oils for stretch marks. I want to show these.
Dr. Z: Oh, man. These are like tip bombs today.
Mama Z: Yes. Yes.
Dr. Z: You guys are getting extra.
[0:34 – 0:55] Intro
Hey there, Dr. Z here.
Mama Z: And this is Mama Z. And welcome to Episode 9 of our Natural Living Family podcast.
Dr. Z: Each week we invite you into our home to talk about how you can master the art and science of natural living. And we share the very same tips our family uses each and every day. So, you can enjoy an abundant life with us.
Mama Z: So, come on in and get comfortable. After all you’re one of the family. Our Natural Living Family.
[1:00 – 1:46] Sponsor Spotlight: AquaTru
Before we dive into all of the fun today, we’re excited to share a special note about today’s sponsor.
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[1:55 – 2:39] Diffuser Reveal: The Get ‘er Done Blend
So, Sabrina, are we ready to finish everything we have to finish in one episode?
Mama Z: Absolutely.
Dr. Z: Are you sure?
Mama Z: Yes
Dr. Z: I got your commitment?
Mama Z: We have to talk about what’s in the diffuser or it isn’t going to help us.
Dr. Z: This isn’t going to be five more parts is it because we’ve already talked about this. Each of these bullet points can be a whole entire episode.
Mama Z: Get it. Yes.
Dr. Z: I got your commitment?
Mama Z: Yes.
Dr. Z: You’re accountable now to all the millions of people listening.
Mama Z: Oh, I am. In order to get ‘er done. This is my get ‘er done blend.
Dr. Z: Get ‘er done blend.
Mama Z: Yes. So, I have a drop of orange, a drop of lime, a drop of lemon, a drop of grapefruit, and two drops of peppermint. It’s my get ‘er done blend.
Dr. Z: Oooooooh. I love it.
Mama Z: Yay.
Dr. Z: Well, let’s get it done.
Mama Z: Okay.
[2:40 – 4:39] The Art of Self-Love Continues
Dr. Z: What is this? This is Part 2 of the Art of Self Love. Last week, Episode number 8. I loved it actually, and I didn’t want to stop it. And that’s why we had to go to part 2 because the love just overflowed.
What’s that movie? Love Comes Softly, where the Grahams had so many kids. Remember that?
Mama Z: Yeah. How was a baby made and the love spilled over made a baby. This family had a lot of kids. So, they were like, “Oooh, there’s a lot of love spilling over there at the Grahams.”
Dr. Z: How do you explain to your kids, right? I love that movie. If you haven’t watched it, pick up the Love Comes Softly series.
Mama Z: So, awesome.
Dr. Z: A lot of love spilling over here at the Zielinski house. So, last time we unpackaged what the art of self-love means. And we touched base on three of the ten techniques that we want to be sharing from our dear friend Kim Morrison’s book The Art of Self-Love. We helped show you how to unplug from technology, which is so key.
We encouraged you to how to move and how to get your hands dirty in the garden. And just enjoy the experience of growing something. And by the way, you can check out Mama Z’s mini master class on how to do organic gardening at OrganicGardenClass.com. We want to give you a free sneak peak into her mini master class.
We also stressed the importance of creating special family rituals, which is something that we’re big fans of here.
And we made sure to give you lots of tips and examples of how do these things.
So, if you didn’t tune in, do yourself a favor and check out Episode 8 because if you can get this down. If you can master this discipline of self-love, I promise you it will change your life.
This week we are going to start tackling the remaining seven techniques. Starting with giving yourself an aromatic bath or shower. And how to give yourself some spa days because that’s such an important part of your life. And be sure to stay tuned to the very end of this episode because during the Natural Living Family podcast tip, Mama Z is going to give you her detox bath recipe that includes some special essential oils.
Mama Z: Whoo hoo. Absolutely.
[4:40 – 12:41] The Many Forms of Self-Love
Dr. Z: So, before I hand it over to Mama Z to talk about her aromatic bath and spa day thing, here’s the thing. We are so appreciative of our dear friend Kim Morrison because she gave us a copy of her book. And she signed it and left us a sweet note. You can find Kim at kimmorrison.com. Or she is also on Instagram, look up @kimmorrison28.
And these self-love techniques are inspired by her book. Her book included 28, because she is all about 28. The cycle of life. Your skin regenerates itself on 28-day cycle. Women, obviously, you’re on a 28-day cycle you know what that’s like, right? So, we as human beings are on this monthly cycle. And Kim had a beautiful way of incorporating one aspect of self-love for every day of the cycle. And so what we did is we condensed that down to ten.
And, Sabrina, let’s talk about giving yourself an aromatic bath or shower a little spa day.
Mama Z: Yes. So, it might not be exactly what you think, but of course, again self-love in order to be everything and do everything that you are for yourself, your family, for your work. You have to be able to take care of yourself first.
Dr. Z: Yeah. How can you love others like yourself if you don’t love yourself? We touched base on that.
Mama Z: Yes. We sure did.
Dr. Z: You’ve got to fall in love with yourself, you all.
Mama Z: You do. And so, some of my spa days that I do are more topical. Like getting my nails done. I have an organic place that I go locally here. And then my best friend of course she does nails as well.
Dr. Z: You want to give them a shout out? People listen locally.
Mama Z: Yeah. At the Nail Spa. It’s a nail spa, a modern spa.
Dr. Z: Where’s that? What city?
Mama Z: It’s like right on the corner of like the Woodstock Acworth area.
Dr. Z: How cool would it be to run into you getting your nails done? I bet you the ladies are like, “I want to run into Mama Z.” Anyway.
Mama Z: It’s so fun. They follow us. They follow what we do.
Dr. Z: And Lisa.
Mama Z: And Lisa, of course, if you are in the mid-Michigan area. Or the Great Lakes State Region, I think they call it.
Dr. Z: Midland, Michigan.
Mama Z: Yes. Midland, Michigan. Then Lisa’s Natural Nail Boutique. Fabulous. And the thing is at places like hers, they also do hair, and facials, and massages, and other things like that. So, I kind of consider it my PT because I run and I do a lot of sports and stuff like that.
Dr. Z: Your physical therapy? PT.
Mama Z: Yeah. Physical therapy. So, I get massage every other week. Really to help with destressing the tissues. But what’s really important, and some people don’t think about this. That is also going to stir up some things. So, you want to be able to do a detox bath. Use the Epsom salts and stuff and we’ll get into the recipe later.
It literally helps to further that detox process. And so, when you are as active as we are, it’s extra important to take good care of your body too. So, that’s another way.
Of course, I had mentioned facials, we do that ever so often. And it’s really nice when my friend comes to visit, because then we can give each other facials. We love trading off different services for one another.
I’ve helped personally train people.
Dr. Z: Because you’re a certified esthetician, right?
Mama Z: Yes. And I’ve helped with waxing.
Dr. Z: Is there anything you’re not certified in?
Mama Z: I’ve done a couple of things there.
Dr. Z: Seriously.
Mama Z: Hey. When I went to college, in the summers I went to beauty school. So, it was just another interest of mine. And I graduated with a degree in marketing and a degree in management. But I really, really, really enjoyed make-up and hair, and doing all that kind of stuff. It was just another passion of mine.
So, I find it to be really fun. Like I’ve personally trained people and they’ve given me massages. Or I’ve made body products for people and they’ve given me a facial.
The friends that you have you are able to trade off with each other and have it be a blessing. So many times my best friend and I have sat there and gave each other foot massages at the same time. And my mom and I have done that. And it’s just so fun.
And hey, you did that for me the other day. You gave me a foot massage and a back massage.
Dr. Z: I did. That’s your love language.
Mama Z: Oh, it is so, oh, my goodness yes.
Dr. Z: So, we don’t have an excuse that, I can’t afford it. Do we? Like, “I can’t afford that.” “I can’t afford doing this.” “I can’t afford to do that.”
Mama Z: You have always said, even on a student budget.
Dr. Z: Right. It’s coming to me.
Mama Z: You, I remember you had bought me Groupon massages.
Dr. Z: We crushed the Groupons.
Mama Z: Oh yeah.
Dr. Z: We lived on Groupons.
Mama Z: Yeah. And then of course we met friends that had discounted services if you bought packages and stuff like that. But those things are really important. And especially being a mom when you’re hunched over breast feeding all of the time. Your lower back and your upper back can suffer as your body parts from working out.
Dr. Z: The bartering though. This is something interesting. If you have any sort of bartering skill, that could be sewing, cooking, cleaning, loving, writing, I don’t know, dancing, anything. I’m just thinking.
Mama Z: Anything.
Dr. Z: Anything you could do to barter. Imagine bartering because a lot of entrepreneurs, and I’ll raise my hand here including, I’ll barter all day long.
Mama Z: Yeah.
Dr. Z: I love bartering. So, I love that. I didn’t think about that.
Mama Z: But it’s so important because that’s huge, and everybody has a skill to offer or they are able to learn. Even my best friend she taught me how to do nails. And I watched her and I learned from her because then we could be able to trade off. I could help her relax too.
Dr. Z: Anyone can give a shoulder rub. Anyone can give a foot rub.
Mama Z: Seriously, yes.
Dr. Z: Hand rub. Hey, if you got a foot thing. Some people are weirded out by feet. I’m telling you something, most people don’t think about massaging their hands. But hey, we’ve got to do an episode on just like the dangers of technology because text neck and our thumbs, I’m telling you something, you all. We don’t realize it but we’re giving ourselves little micro-dislocations in our joints in our thumbs because we text so much.
And our joints are getting cramped up. I actually have to adjust my bones in my hands because I find myself on my phone so much. So, I actually relax my hands and giving it a nice massage. That’s key.
Mama Z: My massage therapist has a great technique.
Dr. Z: I’ll do that right now.
Mama Z: And what she says to do is take thicker rubber band and put it around all of your fingers and then put your fingers out like you are opening them.
Dr. Z: Basically, you want to squeeze your hand open. Open your hand, open as much as you can.
Mama Z: But with a rubber band around it.
Dr. Z: Yes.
Mama Z: So, then it forces you to work those muscles to strengthen. I try to do 100 reps per day. And even if it’s when I put my fingers through my coat and it’s constrained there, I’ll even do it then. Just because I want to strengthen those muscles.
Dr. Z: It is so tender in there, right?
Mama Z: Oh, yeah. That’s a good stress point.
Dr. Z: Right between my index finger and thumb.
Mama Z: Oh, and there’s a lot of pressure points there. You can really send someone to their knees with that one.
Dr. Z: I know. How important is that? So, okay, self-love, home spa. You know one thing, you have your routine, and unless the house is on fire you ain’t not doing it. Like you do this.
Mama Z: No. If I schedule an appointment, I’m going to that appointment because I never cancel.
[12:42 – 16:55] Mama Z’s Post-Shower Routine and Famous Oil Base
Dr. Z: But your routine after the shower and stuff, all the different layers of all of the different ointments.
Mama Z: Oh yeah, yeah.
Dr. Z: You have a very intense …
Mama Z: Regimen.
Dr. Z: Yes. And how many different layers of things can you put on your skin?
Mama Z: Well, you know what? I went to see my nurse midwife. I love her to pieces.
Dr. Z: You have no stretch marks on your body.
Mama Z: Yeah. She said, “I can’t believe it.” She’s like, “You have not a stretch mark.” And I was like, yay.
Dr. Z: So, what’s your little routine?
Mama Z: So, I make of course my Mama Z’s oil base.
Dr. Z: So, you got out of the shower.
Mama Z: Out of the shower, but remember your pores are starting to close 30 seconds to two minutes after you get out of the shower. So, it’s so important to get moisture on. Especially, to your most important areas. So, the first place I’m going to put moisture on is my face. And then, the second place is all over my body.
And then, if I am doing different kinds of roller bottles or whatever for that particular day. Depending upon what I am doing is all going to change what I’m using as far as essential oils. I change up my essential oils all of the time. And I have three different ones that I rotate through.
I have my roller bottles that I use in addition to that. So, every day is a new.
Dr. Z: What’s layer one though?
Mama Z: Oh, layer one is that Mama Z’s oil base.
Dr. Z: Okay. If you don’t know what that is go to NaturalLivingFamily.com and type up Mama Z oil base. It’s by far, out of all of the recipes that we’ve gotten, this is the, not only the most popular, but the most impactful. And believe it or not it doesn’t include essential oils. This is the base. It’s the best carrier oil you’re ever going to use.
So, after that? What’s after that?
Mama Z: Well, and the reason why is because it has all of the different kinds of oils the reach the different levels of your dermis of your skin.
Dr. Z: What are they?
Mama Z: So, we have the raw organic coconut oil, organic almond oil, organic jojoba oil, and also Vitamin E. And depending upon the season I may do 100 percent pure Vitamin E and 100 percent pure Vitamin A in the form of organic rose hip seed oil. Depending on what time of year it is.
Dr. Z: Give them a tip here, because this is something we got. And also, if you go to the website, Mama Z, I think I’m with you on this one. We have a video that’s up on YouTube that shows you how to make this. But here’s a tip, anything, I don’t care what it is, anything with regular coconut oil will harden at most room temperatures unless you are living in a tropical or warm environment. What’s your tip, because this is something we get all of the time? It’s hardening. How do you soften it? When you make a batch or two.
Mama Z: So, when you make a batch I always store them in canning jars. And in order to get the raw organic coconut oil ready for making it, I put it in a hot sink of water. And that’s it. I don’t boil it. It’s just tap hot. And let it sit because when you have the raw organic coconut oil at 72 or 76 degrees is when it goes to liquid.
Dr. Z: And when we had the baby, we had a little space heater in the room during that time or whatnot to keep the room warm. I remember you put on the space heater.
Mama Z: Yeah. Yeah. I had it there. I was like, “Hey, we’ll take advantage of it.” And then when I batch it out, I have it in large canning jars. So, 32oz canning jars. And then I just make it go to liquid before I add the essential oils. And I don’t add the essential oils until right before I’m going to use it. So, this time of year, as it does get a little bit harder, then I will add a little bit of shea nut oil or some of the other things that I mentioned just so I can keep the liquidity a little bit more so.
Dr. Z: So, layer one is the Mama Z oil base? What’s layer two?
Mama Z: Yes. So, there’s another shea butter that I use that I like. And sometimes I will use it. If I’m in a hurry I won’t. But I love that. And then I use my oils in my roller bottles.
[16:56 – 21:00] Topical Blend for Stretch Marks and Scarring
Dr. Z: Now, don’t you do something special for the tummy? Because of the stretch marks.
Mama Z: No. Well ,yes and no.
Dr. Z: You did after the pregnancy for sure.
Mama Z: In the shower I have some extra oils that I use during when I’m pregnant and the skin is growing. It’s mainly made of jojoba oil and fractionated coconut oil. And I put that on so when your chest is growing, and your belly’s growing so you don’t have any of those marks because that is not the time when you want to use tightening and toning stuff. You want your body to be able to expand.
And I saw a friend of mine who had used some tightening toning stuff while she was pregnant. She looked like she got clawed by a tiger. That was before I had ever gotten pregnant. So, I said, “No way.” I did research on it.
But when I am tightening and toning in the shower I use special shower gloves, and I change those out regularly.
Dr. Z: What are they? Exfoliating shower gloves, right?
Mama Z: They are exfoliating shower gloves.
Dr. Z: This is all part of this, you all.
Mama Z: Right. It’s all self-love.
Dr. Z: Again, this isn’t how to bath by Mama Z. Whether you are pregnant, whether you are losing weight, or whether you’re gaining weight I’m telling you something. Stretch marks are a big issue for a lot of people. And who wants to go out in bikini body with stretch marks. Literally she’s talking about people that looked like they were clawed by lions because of stretch marks. And that’s something that can easily be remedied if you have a little proactive approach using these kind of oil bases.
Mama Z: And I have a special protocol if people who have had surgery or Cicerean section for the scarring because you have to deal with the scarring first then the stretch marks.
But the gloves that I just got they are actually activated charcoal gloves. I can’t wait to play around with these things. So much fun.
Dr. Z: So, what are the top essential oils. Hey, we are giving people all kinds of good tips today. What kind of essential oils do you recommend for scarring? This is a huge question we get from out Natural Living Family members.
Mama Z: Yes. I actually have a list that I’d love to share.
Dr. Z: Do you?
Mama Z: Yes. I have my scarring oils because I get asked this so often that it’s worth noting. You would be so surprised. So, my big scarring oils are lavender, helichrysum, myrrh, chamomile, frankincense, geranium, lemon grass, and as an optional I put rose because rose is amazing, but it is so expensive.
Dr. Z: Is this a blend?
Mama Z: Yes. I make an equal part blend.
Dr. Z: Do you want to repeat?
Mama Z: Yes.
Dr. Z: Equal part blend.
Mama Z: Yep. Lavender, helichrysum, myrrh, chamomile, frankincense, geranium, lemongrass and rose as my optional just because it is so expensive.
Dr. Z: Eight. And one question we get asked all the time whenever we say anything about essential oils is, “I don’t have this. What do I use?” When you do something that is essential oil based preparation, you don’t see substitutions like you see in your favorite cookbook where if you don’t want to use regular milk you can use coconut milk. If you don’t want to use white sugar you could use a little bit of maple syrup or stevia.
So, when it comes down to it, if you don’t have any of these, fine, just don’t use that one.
Mama Z: My top three though.
Dr. Z: What are your non-negotiables?
Mama Z: Non-negotiables are lavender, helichrysum, and chamomile.
Dr. Z: I would actually add frankincense to that only because of the sheer volume of people that I’ve heard, and I’ve read, and all of the comments we’ve gotten, people using frankincense for skin tags. Using frankincense for just anything topical.
Mama Z: And I use that definitely when it comes to the stretch marks as well.
Dr. Z: See, stretch marks and scarring. This is cool. Again, this is the art of self-love. How much do you love yourself? Do you love yourself enough to give yourself a little bit of pampering?
[21:01 – 25:39] Self-Pampering Options for Men
Pampering for a guy, Lisa was so sweet before our wedding. She gave me a manicure. Didn’t really enjoy it. It wasn’t my thing. I’ve had a couple of manicures before. I don’t mind facials. I like a good massage.
Mama Z: I like when your hands are manicured though.
Dr. Z: Yeah. I don’t know. My dad’s a truck driver. I’m from Detroit. You don’t do that. I’m still holding on my guy card.
Mama Z: No, no. Your guy card is still intact. And it’s actually more pleasant to not get stabbed by your little frays on your fingernails.
Dr. Z: For men it’s a little bit different than for the ladies. So, for guys I like a massage. And I don’t get them enough. But whenever I travel I call it my spa summit. You know me. I’m a big tele summit guy. I’ve hosted three of them. I’m in dozens of them. So, whenever I go on a business trip I always book a massage somewhere locally, usually at the hotel I’m staying at or resort or something. And I call it my spa summit interview.
And I’m telling you something, that’s nice for me. That’s my self-love. But also, I like going to the barber. And I like going to a barber that does one of those straight razors.
Mama Z: Except, you’re so funny, you go in there and you go, “Except, don’t make it look like I got my haircut.” And I’m like, “Why did you go then?” I think that’s so hilarious.
Dr. Z: Well, you know what that means though?
Mama Z: You’re going to go back next week?
Dr. Z: No, if I had the time I would get a haircut every week. So, my hair looks the same always because my hair at least, and one thing, I don’t know if you’ve guys have seen me? I kind of have this mixture of an afro and Brillo pad hair. I don’t know where I got this from.
Mama Z: Your hair is pretty soft though. It’s softer than a Brillo pad.
Dr. Z: Well ,it’s not rough. But it fro’s out. It goes one direction.
Mama Z: Oh, yeah.
Dr. Z: Up. And we’ve talked about whenever I’m in deep thought.
Mama Z: It’s his thinking hair. You’re thinking hair. I’m still so surprised that your hair is still so thick with all of the times that your run through it.
Dr. Z: Well, it stimulates the follicles because I’m growing more hair.
Mama Z: He’s got lots of follicle growth going on over there.
Dr. Z: Well, the thing about the hair though, is there’s that transition period where it doesn’t look right after a couple of weeks and it starts getting too poufy.
Mama Z: Well, you know the difference between a good haircut and bad cut?
Dr. Z: Two week.
Mama Z: Two weeks.
Dr. Z: Because that’s what you told me. So, that’s why I want to get my haircut. So, when I go to the barber I’m like, “Hey, I don’t want to look like had a haircut, but I need to be cleaned up.” What’s her name? Christiania, I finally found someone that’s got it down. It has taken me ten years living in Georgia to finally have somebody who can manage my hair. Other people, usually look at these poor people when I went BoRics or Great Clips, these ten dollar places. They are like, “What do I do with your head?”
Mama Z: You would just be like, “Where’s the coupon in the mailbox for this week? Where am I going?”
Dr. Z: I know. You tried to cut my hair once. That’s not self-love, y’all. That’s not happening again.
Mama Z: Oh, gosh. Here’s what happened. When I cut his hair, I thought it looked pretty good. And then I asked him for my tip and he goes, “Believe me. Me not paying you any extra is the tip.”
Dr. Z: All right. I love you. You’re my favorite.
Mama Z: So, I have oils for stretch marks. I want to share those.
Dr. Z: These are like tip bombs today. You guys are getting extra. We can even try to do a big tip episode.
Mama Z: With the scarring and with the stretch marks I only use organic jojoba or fractionated coconut oil for those because they are much more watery. They are going to permeate the dermis of the skin so much deeper. So, for that I use lavender, myrrh, frankincense, sandalwood, and helichrysum.
Dr. Z: There you go. All right. At the end of the episode stay tuned, Mama Z’s going to give you her recipe for her detox bath, which is by the way the ultimate act of self-love.
Giving yourself the freedom after the kids are in bed or before you tackle a project that night, or whatever it might be. Getting some candles, diffusing some oils, and giving yourself a little bath.
Mama Z: I’m laughing because my parents are coming. And my dad slipped and fell. And his elbow went into his ribs and he bruised his ribs. And so, he’s like, “Man, I really like that essential oil stuff you got over here for that.” So, he’s been using arnica and essential oils and all of the stuff.
Dr. Z: Her dad’s a man’s man.
Mama Z: So, I said, “Oh, I’ve got a great detox bath all set for you.” And my mom was like, “I don’t think he’s had a bath since we were stuck in some hotel in Europe and we got stuck in a room with just a bathtub.” He goes, “It was the worst thing ever.” I said, “Well, don’t worry. We’ve got a big bathtub, so you’ll be able to detox in that and that’s going to help you sleep better.” Because he is having problems with sleep. So, I’m even going to try it on my dad.
Dr. Z: Hey, he loves the jacuzzies.
[25:40 – 31:19] Self-Love in Nutrition Form
All right number two. Up your greens. What number are we on, I’m losing count?
Mama Z: This is number two.
Dr. Z: Yeah. But we already did three from last episode. So, this number two for this episode, number five in total. Again, we are trying to cover the top ten ways that we got from our friend Kim Morrison’s book, The Art of Self-Love.
Mama Z: Right.
Dr. Z: So, number five/number two. Does that make sense? Number two for this episode.
Mama Z: Yeah.
Dr. Z: Okay. Self-love real quick, just up your greens. Up your greens. Set your pantry and fridge with wholesome food. This is an act of self-love. Do you love yourself enough to eat good food to prep or do you not?
Mama Z: Absolutely. So, one of the things with this is, and people ask us all the time. I see people at every salad bar and they put salad and all kinds of stuff on their plate and then they pour all kinds of dressings over the top. Okay because they want to increase their greens.
But the thing is that when you eat out any salad dressings are going to have sugar, dairy most likely, soy, other things that are very inflammatory to the body.
Dr. Z: Tons of preservatives.
Mama Z: It’s horrible. And so, sacrifice for things. What I do, and this is a big tip, is to take your salad and have that be what you put your main dish on. So, have your main dish be the salad dressing for your salad. And take a bite of your main dish and eat greens with it. That way, that is the salad dressing.
Dr. Z: That works really well with lasagna for example. If you can get like a gluten free, dairy free lasagna.
Mama Z: Even if there are angel eggs.
Dr. Z: We don’t do deviled eggs by the way we do angel eggs.
Mama Z: Angel eggs.
Dr. Z: They are great though. I can’t believe people say that. By the way don’t say that. If you’re a Christian especially, don’t be like confessing like you’re going to eat devil eggs.
Mama Z: I don’t even know how that even came about.
Dr. Z: That irks me. Angel eggs. I came up with that. I take the point.
Mama Z: Yeah because I called it that and you’re like, “I don’t like that.”
Dr. Z: No. I didn’t marry no devil egg woman.
Mama Z: Nope. Only angel eggs over here. And of course, we use essential oils in that and we put paprika and dill on there.
But anyway, those are even good for the dressing for your salad. Or you know a salmon or tuna on top.
Dr. Z: But again, the importance though. We have to talk about health. And by the way.
Mama Z: Some people are like, “I just don’t like greens,” or “I just don’t like vegetables.”
Dr. Z: You owe it to yourself.
Mama Z: You do because that is going to help your digestive tract. It’s going to help so many things in your body. And it’s worth it. And so, another great thing of course, my favorite is beets. And anybody who knows me if I could be any kind of vegetable I would definitely be a beet. Seriously, I love beets. It’s ridiculous.
So, but upping your greens. And one of the things that we put out that I absolutely love is our toxic free healthy home makeover. That you can watch for free, right?
Dr. Z: Yep. You can go to NaturalLivingFamily.com/homemakeover. Or just go to the website and poke around and type up home makeover.
Mama Z: Right. And so, what we did was, and I love this, we went to the five areas of our home that can be the most toxic. And that we had transition for the last 15 years on that. And we are talking the bathroom, and the pantry, and the kitchen, and the laundry room, as well as the garden in your shed, so to speak. Or in my case, my she-shed.
Dr. Z: I love that, she-shed. We are going to do an episode on the she-shed. I had no idea what a she-shed.
Mama Z: If the sound wasn’t too echoey, we could literally have a podcast in the she-shed.
Dr. Z: We need to do a podcast in the she-shed. Chris, can we do that?
Dr. Z: We got to do one in the sauna too.
Mama Z: Yeah.
Dr. Z: We are going to do one in the sauna and one in the she-shed. We’ve got to get on location here.
Mama Z: Oh, I love it. On location, perfect.
Dr. Z: I can’t wait until we do one on our next honeymoon, or whatever we are calling it.
Mama Z: Yeah. One of these days coming soon, I’m going to wear fashion from 15 years ago for our YouTube crowd. And it was the outfit I wore when I met you. I found it in the closet. I don’t even know why I still had it. It’s pretty wild fashion.
We always think we look so good then, until we look at the pictures ten years from now.
Dr. Z: I think your outfit will look good. You look cute, by the way.
Mama Z: Aww, thank you.
Dr. Z: You look adorable. See, everyone listening you miss out because we record this. We put it up on YouTube and Facebook and other streaming. Actually, go to the website, go to NaturalLivingFamilypodcast.com, look up this episode, Episode 9. And watch the video. And doesn’t Mama Z look cute, everybody? You’re adorable.
Mama Z: Thank you.
Dr. Z: And you’ve got the whole the ambiance. See we’ve got Kim’s book here, the pink, and you made me wear pink. And you’ve got pink flowers. The whole thing. The Feng Shui.
Mama Z: You’ve got to Feng Shui the room. Absolutely.
Dr. Z: All right. Loving yourself enough to eat the healthy food.
Mama Z: Yes.
Dr. Z: Because you will feel good, you’ll look good. Get the diet book, Essential Oils Diet because you will fall in love with how you look and we want you to not hate how you look anymore.
Mama Z: No. A workout because you love your body. Not like you are going to punish your body.
Dr. Z: That’s the next episode. If we can finish these points, right?
Mama Z: Seriously, I’m not kidding. Workout like you love your body because you do and need to no matter stage of life that you’re in. And it’s very important.
[31:20 – 38:16] Self-Love Tip #3: Clean the House
Dr. Z: How about number three? Act of self-love, again inspired by our friend, Kim Morrison’s book The Art of Self-Love. Clean the house. Select a room to declutter. This is big. Select a room or if you can’t do a room yet, just do a drawer if you have a lot junk drawers. Select a room to declutter, rearrange, and redecorate.
Mama Z: I so love this. So, this summer a couple of girls that helped us out, college interns, Natalie and Fay.
Dr. Z: Yay. Love those girls.
Mama Z: Yeah. And they would be like, “What can we tackle next for you?” So, I’m like, “Okay, garage. All of the garage drawers and stuff like that.” So, Fay was like, “Can I take it all to Goodwill?” And I was, “Well, we’re going to keep a couple of things.” And so, we delivered two jumbo moving boxes full of stuff. And then, so then they are like, “What is the next area?” So, I’m like, “Let’s tackle my Christmas room.” And, this house doesn’t have a ton of storage. So, this is where we put all of the Christmas boxes, when we make our super greens, all of the other stuff, and then pictures because I rotate pictures around the house. And so, we just gutted this room. It was awesome.
I dreaded going in there before. And when you do that it’s such an awesome act of self-love. You enjoy going and looking at that place again because it’s all set. It’s all ready for you. It is such a clean-minded feeling.
And I know so many people, I remember hearing this when I was going through school. I had some friends that were in the nursing program. And they would say, “Oh, have you gotten your studying done?” “Nope, but my room is really clean.
And so, I felt the same way. I needed the house clean and to be able to not even focus on that in order to focus on the stuff that I needed to.
Dr. Z: Now, imagine if that Christmas rom mess feel was your living room, or your kitchen, or your bedroom? If that’s you, you know what? Owe it to yourself. And one thing I actually was really impressed with Sabrina when we met was the sheer volume of friends from church that you would have over at your home on a regular basis. Especially when we were getting ready to get married, and all of your friends came over and helped you clean, and helped you pack, and of that stuff.
Mama Z: Oh, yeah, that was awesome.
Dr. Z: You just made a huge vat of chili with some organic non-GMO corn muffins and a big salad. And you were like, “Hey, come on over. It’s a work day at my house.”
Mama Z: And it’s so funny. One of my moms in the faith, she was like, “Do yourself a favor. Don’t serve the food until you’re done working.” She goes, “I did that before and then we got no work done.” So, I waited. I had it set so that it would ding when it was the right time because I obviously want to wait until it’s done. But we had so much fun.
This is hilarious. One time I had a juicing party at my house, okay. But my friend had the same juicer as me, and couldn’t find the top thing.
Dr. Z: Yeah, the dowel?
Mama Z: Yeah. So, the next day I saw broccoli and carrots on my ceiling. And I literally had a juicing part. It was so much fun though. We got tons of organic vegetables. These are all people my age at the time. Just post-college and stuff. And we just had a fun juicing party. We would have workout parties, juicing parties, volleyball, all kinds of things.
Dr. Z: So, what do you do? Call your best friend over get your local Natural Living Family peeps, and say, “Hey, I need your help. I’ll provide the food. I need some elbow grease. Let’s clean my bedroom. Let’s clean my living room. Let’s redecorate this.” And you know what? You will walk into your home, if your home isn’t what you want it to be. And I’ll say one thing again, Sabrina, you keep an impeccable house. And we have to talk about that because that was a transition because I don’t mind having something that looked perfect all of the time.
Mama Z: And I’m a clean as you go girl. I do not want stuff piled up. I want it cleaned and I want it put back. And with all of my natural cleaners that I make, I make them smell amazing so anybody who comes in is like, “What is that?” Like my peppermint granite spray that I make. And they actually want to clean because it smells so good. And so, we clean in between and it’s very therapeutic as well. And I think it’s important.
Dr. Z: Oh. And that’s something too. You owe it to yourself. If you’re really, really busy and you’re working. And if money isn’t an issue, especially. You owe it to yourself to pay someone to do a deep clean at your home.
Mama Z: Yes.
Dr. Z: And you also owe it to yourself to ask your loved ones, during your holidays or birthday gift to get you a coupon.
Mama Z: Yes.
Dr. Z: And what did we do for your mom?
Mama Z: We did.
Dr. Z: We bought your mom six months’ worth.
Mama Z: Terra and Maria’s Cleaning Service. And I’ll you they are no joke.
Dr. Z: And you mom’s like, “Can you extend this for Christmas?” Your mom was so sweet.
Mama Z: She’s like, “How long does this go for, because we really like it.?”
Dr. Z: Every month, it’s just once a month.
Mama Z: Yeah. And when I grew up we had a cleaning lady that came once a week. And I just learned so many good work ethics. And I learned how to scrub toilets from her. And I know we’ll talk about it. I asked her one day, I was like, “Do you like scrubbing toilets?” And she goes, “If you have a heart for it you can love any job.” And she was a Christian woman and she would take time and talk to us as she would clean and stuff. So, I always like coming home for lunch on Tuesdays, so that I could at least hang out with her.
Dr. Z: That’s cool.
Mama Z: But you do owe it to yourself.
Dr. Z: It could be just $200. It doesn’t have to be a lot of money. Again, we are trying to make things, “Well, I’m not rich and famous. I don’t have a housekeeper.” No, no, no.
Mama Z: Well, we were not. And do you remember when I got pregnant with Isabella? You were like, “You need to let go of something. You need to let go of something, whether it’s cleaning or this or that. But you need to let go of something.”
Dr. Z: There’s all kinds of different ways of doing it, you all. Whether it’s a Groupon or whatever. Just try it once. But just know having a clean house and decluttering is key.
Next, we have four more we want to tackle today, right.
Mama Z: Yep.
Dr. Z: We want to tackle share yourself, pay it forward, the importance of having an inspirational or Bible verse on you, meeting with friends that lift you up, and I’ll let you finish with this, creating date nights and having sex. That’s something that Kim makes a big point about, especially if you’re married.
But before we do, we have a special note from out sponsors.
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[39:20 – 45:35] Self-Love Tip #4: Share Yourself
Dr. Z: All right. I’m telling you something. Number four today, this share yourself concept, this pay it forward concept. I was not expecting that when I read Kim’s list. Kim has this list of 28 ways of practicing self-love. I didn’t think about sharing myself as a gift to the world.
Mama Z: Well, I’ll tell you I babysat for a lady. And it was like every other week most of my junior high and high school time. And she told me, she said, and one day I was feeling awful. She goes, “When you’re feeling awful, something like babysitting or sowing into somebody else will definitely make you feel better.” And I thought about that.
And what you pay it forward and what you put into the lives of other people comes back into your own. And you don’t do it for that purpose. You do it to bless people. But it does bless you back.
Dr. Z: I didn’t learn that lesson until I became a Christian. Is that I literally felt better when I was giving. It is truly better to give than to receive. Now don’t get me wrong, I like a gift. I like something. I like receiving nice things. But I remember when I was just really pouring into someone’s life. It might have been our good friend Eric Reinhardt. I remember Eric was going through something. My whole world was devoted to him at that one moment. Everything I had. No technology, no phone, I wasn’t talking to anyone.
Mama Z: Yeah, but they had flip phones back then.
Dr. Z: Okay. It was a little different. But still, it was just my entire being was devoted at that moment just to help him, and then I got to say I found myself in this just blessing of entirety. I felt like I was in the presence of God. I felt like this is how God treats us individually all of the time. And then I had the opportunity to minister to somebody else. And then I had the opportunity to minister to somebody else. And whether it was an encouraging word, right, a prophetic utterance, laying hands on someone that they would be healed. Leading someone to the saving knowledge of Jesus.
Sharing a message or encouraging people, that was the most exhilarating experience I’ve ever had. And for me coming from a drug abuse background I know what being high is like. I know what the rush of endorphins, serotine, and dopamine. I know what that’s like.
But having it be natural. Have it come because I was just blessing somebody. And that wasn’t the reason why I did it. But I was like, “Wow, how awesome is this?”
How did Jesus on the cross pray for those people, “Lord forgive them for they not what they do.” Right? Just the satisfaction that the Lord had throughout all of the different trials and tribulations, and all of the prophets and apostles that we read in the Bible.
And I’ll tell you something. There’s this secret to be had. For those people who are mission-mindset. Look at Mother Teresa. Some people will look at her and say, “What kind of life did she live?” She was the richest person on the planet.
Mama Z: Right. Absolutely.
Dr. Z: So, what are a couple of quick tips to how someone can share themselves. When I say, “Pay it forward,” let me word it in this way, “Pay the gift forward that you are to the world.” You are a gift to the world. God broke the mold when he made you.
Mama Z: Absolutely.
Dr. Z: And so, how do you pay that forward, so you don’t hoard it?
Mama Z: Right? One of the best, and this just some of my passion, I’ve been a Special Olympics coach for four decades. Literally, since sixth grade. And that is one the best organizations that I have ever worked with. In fact, I think it was our first date.
Dr. Z: Our very first date was the picnic.
Mama Z: Yeah. I took you the Special Olympics picnic, Area 30 in Michigan. You got to shout out for them.
Dr. Z: Woot woot.
Mama Z: Yeah. But I mean you don’t have any skills whatsoever and you will learned, you will be trained.
Dr. Z: You just need a heart of love.
Mama Z: Yeah. Just to love people. And I’ll tell you that has been the probably the best organization over the years.
Dr. Z: So, find an organization, your local church should be hooked up to many. There is unlimited amount of volunteering opportunities. Especially, if you go to a church. You know what? Suck it up and have a heart full of love for the babies.
Mama Z: Oh, my gosh, yes.
Dr. Z: Because if there’s one thing I noticed, every church is in desperate need for someone to watch the babies. Now, remember, I was 23-years-old.
Mama Z: Yeah. You volunteered right for the nursery.
Dr. Z: The first church I went to. The nursery ministry asked every time. Every church I’ve ever been to, “Hey, we need a little help with the babies in the nursery, and who can help?” I’m like, “I’ve changed a couple of diapers. I had a nephew at the time. I did some babysitting. I could do it.” The only single dude. The only guy by the way. And you know what? That taught me a valuable lesson.
Mama Z: They are like we need to do a background check on this dude.
Dr. Z: Literally, and they did, yeah. Yeah, they did. They did a background check. That’s true.
Mama Z: It all cleared out.
Dr. Z: Why do I want to be with the babies? Because the need was there and I just wanted to help.
Mama Z: Because after we were married they were like, “Oooooh, you’re just warming up over here.”
Dr. Z: Yeah. That’s the other thing. If you’re a guy and if you’re married, maybe be like a door greeter because you’re going to get a lot of slack. Everyone’s going to want you to have a baby. Be careful, if you’re a newlywed.
Mama Z: People asked us before we got to the reception when we were having kids.
Dr. Z: Seriously. Like on the isle. “Are you done?”
Mama Z: “So, when are you having your first baby?” We are literally up in the receiving line and I’m like, “Oh, well we’re going to enjoy married life a little bit.”
Dr. Z: So, let me share with you on more direct way. Don’t be selfish.
Mama Z: Yeah.
Dr. Z: If you don’t share your gift which you are to the world, and you are the gift, meaning you share yourself. Your time. Your gifts. Your talents.
Mama Z: Everybody has gifts.
Dr. Z: If you don’t. You’re robbing the world, and the world will never be what it could and should be. So, do it and guess what? You are going to reap a lot of benefits because you definitely reap what you sow in that area.
Mama Z: Absolutely.
[45:36 – 48:50] Self-Love Tip #5: Carry a Bible Verse with You
Dr. Z: So, next on our list is number five for today, but number eight overall, as we are almost done. I think we can do this. I’m so excited because I am really excited about the next couple of ones. I’m think we can do this within this nice 45-minute, hour time slot that we’ve given ourselves with this podcast.
Carry a Bible verse with you. Carry an inspirational quote with you. This is an act of self-love. Having something that motivates and encourages you. And if you have not put a lot of scripture to memory, and if you want a good data base of where to find scriptures for you name it. Whether it’s scriptures about health, or happiness, or maybe you’re going through a down time and you want scriptures about depression.
My team and I and a huge shout out to Elizabeth. Elizabeth Bond is our director of customer happiness. And she has a heart for the Lord and devotionals.
Mama Z: She’s so sweet.
Dr. Z: She curated most of the Bible verse posts on our website. And by the way, our Bible verse posts are still the top driver of the millions of people that come to our website. Most of them come for those Bible verse posts. Well not most, actually a good split. Bible verse and health and oils.
But a huge chunk of them come. So, if you have any need, go to our website NaturalLivingFamily.com and click on the inspiration tab and you’ll have everything right there. Bible verses about sex. Bible verses about Memorial Day. I don’t care. Bible verses about freedom. About anger, all kinds of things.
So, what you want to do is you want to take one or two, and have them. Get it laminated. Mama Z shared in a previous episode on how to get these little positive inspirational quotes and things to keep your affirmations.
Mama Z: Bible verses together.
Dr. Z: What was it? A key bob thing.
Mama Z: I just put them on a key ring.
Dr. Z: Perfect.
Mama Z: Or if you have a little wallet book, that’s another good thing to use them because they are at least protected. But one of my kids stole mine, and I still can’t find it.
Dr. Z: It’s easy to keep them in the car.
Mama Z: Yeah.
Dr. Z: They are fantastic for your desk office drawer. And I love this inspirational quote calendars. So, if you want to get something, or give something to a loved one. Christmas time comes, get them one of those fun calendars that go on their desk that’s inspirational.
But anyway, that’s such an act of self-love because you are literally doing something that not only will change the physiology of your brain. And that’s something. And that’s the power of positive thinking. It literally changes the physiology of your brain necropsies start to form. You start to increase your dopamine, serotine, endorphin production as you think about positive things. It’s pretty wild when you get down to the science of it.
But what you’re doing is you’re feeding into your spirit. You’re feeding into your soul. And quite frankly I think there are things, or even beyond our ability to understand and comprehend. When we try and focus to have the thoughts of God.
And that’s anything positive. Anything good and healthy, really. The thoughts of God.
So, do it, do yourself a favor. Get yourself some Bible verses and some quotes so you can keep on.
All right. Cool. Two more.
Mama Z: Perfect.
[48:51 – 1:03:54] Self-Love Tip #6: Meet with Friends that Lift You Up
Dr. Z: This is a good one. I want to draw you back to episode number one in this fun journey that we’ve had so far.
Mama Z: Right.
Dr. Z: This act of self-love we’re calling meet with friends that lift you up, not tear you down. And by design our Natural Living Family, our local one that we have, they do that, right?
Mama Z: Absolutely.
Dr. Z: So, the people that you can exercise with, cook with, share with, clean with, love life, do life with, these are people who should be or doing their best to love you for who you are. Unconditionally.
Mama Z: Absolutely. It’s so important. And growing up my parents they had moved away from Minnesota, which is where they lived. And they were the only ones in their family in that area. And so, their neighbors and their church family was their draw for their family in the community. And we absolutely loved every time we spent with our grandparents, and our aunts, and cousins, and enjoyed all of those things. But that wasn’t the day to day. And we weren’t blessed with having people that close. They were 12 hours away.
But we grew up with Mrs. B., Mrs. Buck and Mrs. Brown and the different families. And Gene and Ron, the people that have been a part of our family. Mary Ellen, they have become part of our family. And my mom was like, “Well, family is what you make it. It doesn’t necessarily have to mean that they’re a blood relation.”
And that was huge for me. Being able to set that up wherever you’re at is how you make it.
Dr. Z: And for me that was something that was somewhat foreign to learn because I come from a very staunch Sicilian and old-school Polish background. My dad’s 100 percent Polish. My mom’s 100 percent Sicilian. And in our culture that I was raised in, a law is a law, right? An in-law is an in-law. And blood is thicker than water.
And once I accepted Christ. And once my life was dramatically transformed and I was entered into the body of Christ. I realized that that is one of the most insidious lies of the enemy because I instantly became closer with people that I could relate to on a spiritual level. Then I could from family members that I’ve known for years and years and years.
In fact, how many of family member haven’t we even spoken to since not only since we got married, or since I met Christ, right? I lost a big chunk of my family when I accepted Jesus. It was gone.
Mama Z: Well, they all came to the wedding.
Dr. Z: Well, not all of them. Some did. And that was the thing. Communication and spending time with family on a regular basis because I wasn’t the same person anymore. I wasn’t drinking. I wasn’t smoking. I wasn’t cussing. And they’re like, “What’s this Jesus stuff?” Not like beating them over the head with a Bible. But it was the fact at that point they were not, and some still are, unwilling to accept me for who I am.
And so, yes I pray for them. Yet, why do I want to put myself in a situation where I going to be in their presence a lot, right?
So, love yourself enough where you spend time with the people that help you be your best version of you. That is the key. And that is the epidemy of everything that we are trying to talk about here.
Because you are the sum average of the people that you surround yourself with. So, if you are going to surround yourself with haters and doubters and people that are bringing the worst out of you, that’s what you’re going to manifest
But if you are around people that bring the best out of you, and encourage you, love you, bring you hope, and love, and future that’s what you’re going to live out.
Mama Z: Absolutely. And whenever you can pray for somebody.
Dr. Z: Yes.
Mama Z: I think that’s so important. I think that’s another gift we have to the world. Of course be led by all of that, but if you really feel like somebody needs prayer, then you need to step out and pray for somebody.
Dr. Z: They need it. And you might be the only person standing in the gap. I remember Bible verse in The Old Testament, “God’s spirit going to and fro throughout all of the earth trying to find someone to stand in the gap and be an intercessor.” Sometimes you might be the only person at that moment that someone can maybe have a prayer sent up to Heaven for them. And that might make a world of difference.
Mama Z: Well, and I’m telling you, if somebody comes across your mind once in a day. I’ve always learned to just pray or that person. But if God brings that person to your remembrance more than once, then you need to get on that phone and call that them. And just see what’s going on, what do they need because there’s a reason why and there’s been so many times it’s happened. And I’ve reached out to people and I’m like, “Hey, how you doing.” And it just has been that kind of a day.
And it’s so important to trust, when you get somebody’s picture of them in your mind then really act on it.
Dr. Z: I want to tread very carefully on this one. All right, I want to tread very carefully on this one. One thing that I am thinking about too as we wrap up this and finish out with the last bullet point of our art of self-love techniques. Is abuse. Bullying. And even being married to someone that you really shouldn’t be in the home with because it’s not safe for you or your family. You owe it to yourself to put yourself, your body, right? Your finances, your heart, your emotion, your spirit, you owe it to your children to be in a safe place.
And it’s easier said then done. For a million reasons. I get that. Especially if someone is in a financial situation where she or he does not feel comfortable or they don’t have the ability to get outside the home situation that they are in.
But I experienced a little bit of this. And nowhere at all trying to equate my experience to someone who is being abused at the house. But I was bullied a lot when I was younger. And I was part of a circle of friends of guys that would hang out and I was the guy that they picked on.
And I put up with it year after year after year because that some sort of attention. Some sort of acceptance that I got. But I was the runt of the liter of that group. I was the one that they just bottom line treated like trash. And it wasn’t until I got a little bit older and especially when I became a Christian, I realized I’m worth more than this.
Mama Z: Absolutely.
Dr. Z: And that was just a little piece of that. If I could just experience a little bit of that, I can’t imagine being in a work environment, or a home environment where that is even worse than what I experienced.
Mama Z: Right. And especially like now-a-days, because with the multi-media and the phones. If you were getting bullied, at least then you wouldn’t have to deal with it until tomorrow when it’s like all day, 24-hours a day type of thing. And it’s just a different day.
Dr. Z: So, if it’s a friend situation, drop them like a bad habit. 100 percent. There’s not even a thought, okay.
Mama Z: I’ll never forget I remember my Sunday school teacher saying, “The friends you have right now,” and I was in junior high or something, “You will probably not even know them in the next five to ten years.” And I thought to myself, “Wow.” He’s like, “Look at your circle of friends, and see.” And he says, “You’ll have one, two, three.”
And I’ve still stayed in touch with those people. But he was right. And I thought, “Oh, he’s crazy.” But that is so true. When you are young and you feel like it’s everything.
And I have a zero-tolerance policy for bullies. And you know that.
Dr. Z: So, if it’s a situation where you find yourself spending time with colleagues or friends that really don’t treat you appropriately, then you need to separate yourself first. If you comfortable speaking out to them and letting them know. Let them know how you feel.
And I want to pray actually. I feel like we need to say a prayer right now. If you’re in a situation where you’re literally trapped.
In Atlanta this is something that is very real to us because there’s a lot of sex trafficking in Atlanta. And just in general there’s sex trafficking all over the world.
But there’s a lot of abuse and trauma all over the world. If you are stuck in a situation that you know is not safe for you and is harmful, hurtful, whether you have verbally, or physically, mentally abusive spouse. And it can be both ways by the ways.
I have a friend of mine, a guy, a very strong big dude. He was abused by his wife. And that’s a tough situation because a) you don’t hit back, right? And how do you admit that? That’s a whole level of shame that a lot of men don’t even fathom, right? So, there’s a lot shame, manipulation, control.
But I want to pray for you right now. If this is you, then I want you to just open up your heart and be open and willing to let God show you the way out. And I want to pray for the way out.
Mama Z: Yeah. God will provide a way of escape.
Dr. Z: I want pray that you find a safe place. And then, know that you are worth it and that God will provide, whether it’s a job or finances or whatever it is. He will give you what you need.
Mama Z: And you know there are so many amazing shelters. I’ve driven women to church.
Dr. Z: Yes.
Mama Z: For years. And there are amazing shelters out there in so many different ways. And they are so protected and have been able to minister at different places. And so, there are options. There’s always options.
Dr. Z: You want me to pray?
Mama Z: Why don’t I start and you finish?
Dr. Z: All right. Let’s pray.
Mama Z: All right. Heavenly Father, God I just thank you so much for the people listening, and God I just pray for anybody who is in a difficult situation and they feel like they cannot get out.
God, I pray Lord as they commit this situation to you we know that you will guide their path. And we just thank you, God. We know that you’re well able to give us a way of escape. And we just thank you, God that you are the author and the finisher of our faith and that you love us so much. And your unconditional love, God.
I just thank you, Lord, that you break all of the chains. And I thank you, God for healing. And I thank you, Lord that it’ll come speedily. And I just thank you, Lord for love, mercy, and grace, especially if there’s children in the mix. I just thank you, God for freedom that only you can provide, freedom to be out of this situation that they are in, Lord, if this is your will. And you see the heart, and you know what is in each and every one of our hearts. So, I pray Lord, that it’s you, you Lord, you are our answer to all of this.
Dr. Z: God, we come to you and we ask that you help the helpless, that you give strength to the weak. And that Lord, whatever it is that someone is going through right now, that it will stop in the name of Jesus, Father.
That the abuse that someone could be going through will stop, Father. Whether it be by a parent, be by a spouse, a babysitter, a co-worker, whoever it might be, that it will just stop. That you will change the heart of the abuser, of the person that’s hurting.
And that Father, for our dear Natural Living Family members right, now, the people that are listening we ask that you give them wisdom. That you give them a complete exit strategy to whatever situation that they’re in that will provide for all of their needs. Their financial needs. Their emotional needs. Their physical needs.
Lord, and for those people who are in a situation because they are lonely, because they feel lost, because they feel this person, whether this person might be an alcoholic that comes back and abuses over and over. Lord, that’s not good attention.
And we pray, Father, that you open up the eyes. That people will see the reality of the situation that bad attention is not good attention. Lord, God that you will provide. And that you will fill any sort of hole, or void, or ache, or pain, or something that needs to filled.
Lord, I know what it’s like, God, trying to fill up a void, a hole in my heart with bad attention. And it didn’t help me. It didn’t serve me. So, Lord I thank you so much. That you’ll give people an awakening. And that you’ll let us all see that we are totally one hundred percent worth it. And we are worthy of self-loving.
That we are worthy of being treated well and kind. And that we do not deserve any ill treatment at all. We give praise, God. We give you glory. And we thank you Father, for saving a life right now. For helping people. Amen.
Mama Z: Amen.
Dr. Z: Amen. Amen. Amen.
Mama Z: The verse, Psalm 138.8 “God will perfect that which concerns you.”
Dr. Z: Amen. Amen.
And this is no way shape or form intended to shame anybody. Again, I’ve never been in that situation. I have had friends that have, men and women. Actually, many women that’ve I known. And my grandma.
I remember my grandma. I never met my grandpa, by the way. Ever. My mom would never let me even be in his presence. And I think at one point she didn’t see him for ten years. The only time she saw him was at the funeral.
My grandma left at a time where, my grandma has been long passed. She was born in 1924. So, that was a time when women didn’t divorce men. She divorced grandpa and she was shunned.
Mama Z: Yep.
Dr. Z: She was shunned by a lot of people. You didn’t do that back then. Especially Italian, and Italian men beat their wives. That’s what happened. Grandpa was a drunk. Grandpa was abusive. And you just settle, right? You just take care of it. You just deal with it.
That’s a lie from the pit of Hell.
And so, I know what’s it’s like, and I know what’s like being the product of an abusive environment because sometimes that abuse doesn’t stop, right? And it goes down the line.
Mama Z: Right.
Dr. Z: So, with that said, you all. You’re worth it. Your kids are worth it. And you just know you’re worth it.
[1:03:55 – 1:10:26] Self-Care Tip #7: Cultivate Intimacy in Your Life
Mama Z: Right. So, that brings us now to the last bullet point.
Dr. Z: Yeah.
Mama Z: And creating date nights and of course if you’re married and having intimate relations with your husband.
Dr. Z: You know on a lighter note, Kim, I think it’s number 20. And I’ve got to actually look it up at the book. Let me see, I’ll pull the book out. For those of you who are watching, I think I put a marker. She actually has it and her bullet point literally says, “Have sex!” “Be spontaneous and surprise your partner with a invitation to the bedroom where you will be waiting wrapped in a bow.” Ha. She’s so fun. And she says, “Bring some fun and playfulness to the bedroom and find ways to make you giggle instead of sex as a chore.” And then she quotes Dr. Christine Northrup, author of Women’s Body Wisdom. Talks about the release of nitric oxide and oxytocin during orgasm.
Folks, you all. Here’s the bottom line about sex. Let me just say it. If were not enjoyable I don’t think we would do it. And if we didn’t do it, then our species would become extinct. So, out of all the most carnal instincts that we need as live beings on this planet. You’ve got to eat or you’re going to die. Or you got to have sex. Or you’ve got to drink. Or your species is going to die.
And I believe that sex is so enjoyable for that very reason.
Mama Z: I mean if you don’t have water within how many days is it?
Dr. Z: You could live without water for just a couple of days. You could go a month or so without food. You can go a few minutes without air. But at the end of the day our species can only go one generation without sex.
So, I want to say that because sex shouldn’t be taboo. Especially in the Christian space. And sex should be wildly enjoyable because that’s how God designed it. And if it isn’t that’s where we have essential oils for sex. And that’s where we have all kinds of different remedies.
Mama Z: Isn’t that one of the top things that’s searched on our website?
Dr. Z: Yes. Believe it or not. Our number one, right now, is essential oils for sex. More people are searching for how to use essential oils to boost libido, help with vaginal dryness. So, sex should be enjoyable. And it should be something that is a very sacred one union experience between a husband and a wife. And we want to encourage everyone to do what you need to do to make it as enjoyable as possible.
So, I want you to wrap up really quickly, because one thing you’ve really helped me do, and I think I’ve also risen up to the challenge, but you’re really diligent on date nights. And you set it up for success though.
Mama Z: Right. Yeah. So, all different kinds of date nights. Now, we were supposed to have a date night last week, and we had a babysitter. But we had a bunch that we had to get done. Some tech glitches and some other things. So, instead I got work my done and he got his work done, and we ended up watching a movie on the couch after our babysitter help put the kids to bed with me.
And so, we still got a little bit of a date night. So, it can be whatever you make it. It can be movies at the house. It can be going out to a movie. We have a couple of places that we like to eat. Like our Nature’s Corner Market. We love that place. And we have our Zoomy place that we like as well.
But the skies the limit. So, getting creative. You like to go bowling. So, one night I kidnapped you and told you are going out on a date night tonight. It was like on a Monday or something ridiculous.
Dr. Z: I was working a lot that week.
Mama Z: Yeah. So, I kidnapped you and we went to the Christian Book Store and we went bowling, and then we came back and watched a movie. So, be spontaneous and do those kind of things.
We go painting. We do a lot of different things.
Dr. Z: And there’s a lot of free things though too.
Mama Z: Right.
Dr. Z: Walking and hiking.
Mama Z: So many.
Dr. Z: Yeah. There’s a lot of different things to do.
Mama Z: We’ve been to almost every waterfall from here to up north that you can possibly go to. And so, being in nature and all of that stuff is great too. So it doesn’t have to be something super expensive. Just something that you share.
If it isn’t your thing and it is the other person’s thing, then you just kind of have to like put big girl panties on.
We were talking with a bunch of our friends that are married, or engaged, or were about to be engaged, and for Dr. Z he likes special outfits and stuff like that. That’s not as much my thing. And he likes that kind of thing.
Dr. Z: Like a lingerie or something.
Mama Z: Yeah. My thought is like, “Well, doesn’t that go on the ground?”
Dr. Z: It’s about the process. It’s about the building up. It’s the anticipation. A lot of guys can relate to that.
Mama Z: Okay. Sometimes it’s you just put your outfit on and answer the door that way, if you know it’s your husband of course. Don’t be answering the door if it is Amazon.
Dr. Z: Yeah, I got a tip.
Mama Z: No, no. Back door. You know where only the husband comes through. That’s like the garage door. Yeah. That’s what I’m talking about. It’s so important. So, whether it’s a bow or that, find out what is your love language for your partner.
Dr. Z: Yours is massages.
Mama Z: Yep. So, fill those needs because that’s so important. And whatever your needs are. And it’s not something that you measure. Well you did this or that or this or that and you keep like a record.
It’s just a sowing and giving of yourself to the other person.
Dr. Z: And that’s a wrap.
Mama Z: Okay.
Dr. Z: That is the art of self-love.
Mama Z: Yes, it is.
Dr. Z: Courtesy of our friend Kim Morrison author of The Art of Self-Love. Love her. She actually wrote the best-seller, Like Chocolate For Women. She’s so sweet. Love her. Check her out at kimmorrison.com. or @kimmorrison28 if you follower on Twitter or Instagram.
And so, folks I hope you feel much more equipped with some really cool practical tips to give yourself just a dose of healthy self-love.
Mama Z: And your family and your spouse.
Dr. Z: Yeah.
[1:10:27 – 1:13:00] Natural Living Family Tip: Windowsill Gardening
And to wrap up today’s show we have a special Natural Living tip for you.
Mama Z: One great way to practice self-love is by gardening. And I’m going to give you some windowsill gardening tips for your house.
So, one of the best things I suggest is the three top herbs that you use in your kitchen. I would go get a plant of each of those. Now you can use it in the planter that they give you, and then set that under a small plate in your kitchen. Or you can buy some decorative pots for it. But you really want to make sure that your windowsill has the right kind of lighting.
So, if it’s in the area that has the ability for a light. I suggest putting a plant light in place of your regular lightbulb that you screw in. The lightbulbs are about $5 and if they’re on 24/7 which I suggest. They will last about a month. But it will help create the light that you need to sustain a plant being indoors.
Now, a windowsill garden plant that really belongs outside, it will probably last about three months indoors. And then you will need to transition it to the outside. But in the meantime nurture that plant. Every other week I suggest giving it a little bit blood meal around the outside of the plant. And watering it a least once or twice a week.
Definitely take your finger feel the soil. If it feels dry, then it’s time to give it some water. And how you give it water is you’re going to put it in your sink. Fill it up three times. Let it drain all of the way out. And then put it back on your plate or on the coaster that came with your decorative pot.
So, enjoy your windowsill garden. And get your hands dirty.
Dr. Z: And when you’re watering your plants make sure that you’re using fresh pure water and not tap water unless it’s purified from your whole house. And to help you do that, don’t forget as a special gift to our NaturalLivingFamilypodcast listeners, AquaTru is giving you $100 off of your first order. Plus, a free bottle of minerals that creates alkaline water that is full of life-giving micronutrients. Yeah!
Mama Z: Simply go to NaturalLivingFamilypodcast.com to find this special link so that you can redeem this deal on the show notes from today’s episode.
[1:13:01 – end] Episode WrapUp
Dr. Z: And we want to thank you for listening. We really do.
Mama Z: Yep.
Dr. Z: We really appreciate you just being part of this community. It’s been wonderful this last several of weeks. To get to know each other. And to get to share and we have lots of great topics in store. So, keep on keeping on.
As a reminder you can find all of these episodes and show notes and transcripts and everything you can find. Even watch them with us on YouTube or Facebook all on our website at NaturalLivingFamilypodcast.com. We have links to all of that stuff for you.
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And don’t forget we appreciate you subscribing and leaving a review wherever you listen to this podcast. We appreciate it because we love hearing what you have to say about our show.
Mama Z: Absolutely.
Dr. Z: Yeah. So, with that said, Dr. Z here.
Mama Z: And Mama Z.
Dr. Z: And our hope and prayer is that you and your family truly experience the abundant life.
Mama Z: Yes.
Dr. Z: God Bless, you all.